Wednesday, March 15, 2006

News of the Day

Your Daily News Brief

> Daunte Culpepper was traded from the Minnesota Vikings to the Miami Dolphins for a 2nd round draft pick and pound of raspberry chocolate chip ice cream. Culpepper really stunk it up last year, but I'll miss my 4 year old shouting "Cuullll-pepper." All in all, my wife and I are pleased with our decision not to buy him a $50 #11 Vikings jersey.

> People have been clamoring for my personal opinion on where to have coffee in Mankato. Now that I have had a 16 oz Mocha Ice Crema at a Dunn Bros. in Mankato, I'd vote for the Dunn Bros. in Mankato. Added bonus: The place is clearly a converted Burger King, and is decorated like a furniture store. For dorm lounge furniture.

> Sadaam Hussein took the stand in his trial for the crime of being an evil dictator. With quotes that included the phrase "rivers of blood" and "I am the head of state," I'd say he did little to help his cause. I'll offer deeper analysis when I've read the rest of the article.

At the same time, have you ever imagined a more irrelevant trial than that of Sadaam Hussein? If you find him "not guilty," what are you going to do? Set him up in a two-room apartment in Baghdad and tell him to go get a job? What's he going to do? Open up a cafe? Or, do you apologize and let him run for election on the "My Enemies' Blood Will Flow Like Rivers" ticket? The guy is guilty because we blew up his army and houses and killed his sons and pulled him out of his hidey-hole. Pretending otherwise is theater.

The story I'm missing is the one that actually identifies, for real, who the bad guys are and what they want. I'll get back to you on this.

> This morning I've eaten a frozen waffle (toasted), a cup of milk (refused by my 4-year old) and a cup of coffee (Dunn Bros, Columbian, Dark Roast). If anyone out there has inside connections, please alert CNN.

Thanks.

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